beam me up bob

Well here I am still thanks to vigulant people
thanks to drugs
thanks to the Moody Guthry.
I find it hard to accept that what seems no time at all my body starts failing and each day is painful, thankgoodness that I am at least older. So many brave people in this world,so many young. and here I am having lived life moaning because Im in pain with high blood pressure etc.
I have free medical support and Moody Guthry who when ever I call comes to minister to me. Shopping coffee. Maybe I would not suffer from high blood pressure if I didnt scream inside, I want flowers I want to watch the sunset, I want someone to enfold me in their arms and say I care.
Big deal so do most people in the world.
The sun is shinning outside the wind is blowing the plants are growing and I have a comfortable bed and food, two fantastic cats, five children, nine grandchildren and friends.
I think its time to examine missing.
MISSING
can only happen when things have been, can one miss love if one has never had it?
Can one miss children if one has never had them?
Maybe its grieving I am doing, greiving for the life I had and dreading the life to come.
Put like that its all dross in the wind